Friday, February 17, 2012

Action Figure Lydia

Let me set the scene for this blog.

Wednesday night around, 7:30 pm. Must drove to work for a second to place an order. But realize I need gas. So I pull into local gas at the corner of my street.
Imagine this...I honestly probably dress gross so this crap doesn't happen.
I was wearing my basketball shorts, that go past my knee. and a black shirt, my dirty hair in a ball on top of my head. Not what you would want to be picking up or let alone talking to...

Now on with the blog...

I pull in to my usual gas station, but the Hubster is at home because he is going to bed. He has to get up super early now. So I'm flying solo and roll into the gas station find my pump in the front, near the door. Just in case someone sketchy comes along. I get out of my car, pay at the pump, and begin to put gas into my car.

Then all of a sudden a stupid moron in a white chevy truck, decides he wants to talk to me...

My face -

And if you know this is pretty much the reaction he got.

Now here is are conversation. Yes he wanted to talk to me, I'll type what he wanted to talk about (out of wanting to kill me...probably), the few words i said but I'm going to also give you my thought inside my head...that's were it gets funny.

Moron: I don't want to waste your time but...
My Thought: Then don't...
My Actual Words: Ummmm okay.

Moron: I don't know if you're from here...
My Thought: I'm not now...
My Actual Words: Nope just passing through.

Moron: I don't know if you know where John's Island is...
My Thoughts: I do but you're not founding that shit out...Just to let you know I'm married, husband will track your ass down, my mom is nucking futs, my father-in-law is an ex-navy man along with my dad. I know Italians that may or may not have mob relations.
My Actual Words: *shrugs* no

Moron: I just need gas to get to John's island and its a long story...
My Thoughts: OH shit...seriously...I don't give a flying fuck about your life. Who the hell comes to a gas station and does this shit?! Apparently you.
My Actual Words: ummmm Okay

Moron: I need 5 bucks to gas.
My Thoughts: IF I had 5 bucks: A.) You wouldn't get it. B.) I'm not going anywhere near your creepy truck or your dumbass to give you 5 bucks. C.) okay you can go now.
My Actual Words: Nope, I got paid and already broke.

Moron: *stumbles over words* Well alright (and he drives off)
My Actual Words: About fucking time. *looking around to make sure I'm not going to be redneck ambushed*

So I stop pumping gas, quickly get in my car and call Brent. And tell him I'm never pumping gas alone. LOL!

But then of course my mind begins to play around with what would have happened if he tried something. Then that's when if dawned on me...I need to get fit and become an action figure. Kick Ass Lydia would be the name. I think its fitting in several ways.

But the moron drove to another gas station to get gas and I hit the highway like I was going out of town! LOL! :) I'm fine, I just wanted to let you know I'm going to become an action figure and wanted to share a random event.

I'm outtie!
Bayverse OP facepalm Pictures, Images and Photos

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