Wednesday, December 26, 2012

No Bra...No Make-up...No Video

So because I don't feel like putting on make-up and bra for a video...y'all are getting a grammatically challenged blog! :) And plus I actually feel like writing. It's been brought to my attention that some of my readers like my writing...i.e. my mom. lol

Well first of all I survived the Mayan Apocalypse. Woo...I was a little worried about that one. I didn't think we were going to pull through. But here I type on December 26, 2012! Good trick Mayans...good trick!

And I really hope y'all are enjoying my videos...I really have fun making them. But I also miss writing. So I think it's best to do both. OH! And Dacia, I will do a video of Sally's voice soon! lol And just for you! ;) She and I, along with Jess...and I'm sure other crazy dog ladies...we have voices for our dogs.

Also y'all must check out their blogs! Dacia's blog is AWESOME! Dacia's Blog She is a runner, bicyclist, loser of a lot of weight, super sweet and a lover of dogs!! :)
And Jess's blog is fabulous! Jess's Blog She's a fun size, triathlete trainer, dog lover and battling the bulge with her adorable hubby! She's down about 50 lbs!

I've decided that I'm going to mention a couple of my favorite twitter/bloggers in my blog. Because their all awesome and on the same journey to get healthy! And who doesn't want a good social media support group!

Well the real reason you guys come to read my wonderful blog, is to see how my journey is going! And well it's going, of course! lol I'm melting away. I'm down to 93 lbs gone. I'm soooooo close to that 100 lb mark! HOLY CRAP!! I'm freaking busting from the seams. I feel like a kid on Christmas. lol The anticipation is driving me gaga!! I'm like OMG it's coming, OMG I'm wearing clothes I haven't worn in 5 years at least, OMG I'm the weight I was when Brent proposed 3 Januarys ago, OMG I've really done it!!! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!

So yeah I'm down 93 lbs and to boot, I've been running. Yes,on my own free will and not chasing Sally or whatever. I actually enjoy it, I like the fact it's just me and the pavement. I also have this AWESOME Zombies Run app. It's a couch to 5K program and it cost a couple bucks but I figure if it's gets my ass running and I really like it, then money well spent.

The back story is there is the Zombie Apocalypse and this survivor team has all their runners out, due to smoke inhalation...download to app the find out why or google it! ;) But they need new runners and so they're training you because they need runners to get supplies for the survivors need supplies and you need to out run the zombies...of course. So I'm love the app, you must check it out if you're tired of those old boring couch 2 5K.

So yeah recap: I'm done 93 lbs and I'm a runner and I'm badass!! Yay me!

Since we're talking about being proud. What have you done lately to make yourself proud?

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Weekly Weigh In Video 12/16/12

Watch this one first!

I talked about my weight loss, which is 84.6 lbs!!!!
I also talking about important it is to get your water in!!

 
I really hope y'all enjoy these videos because I actually enjoy making them!!
And Tiffany's name is DanceLiftRun. Sorry I got your name wrong! :)

And here is my email, as promised, if you want to contact me: the218lbelephant@gmail.com

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Houston, We Have A First...



Well I did it! I posted my first video! YAY!!

So please tell me what you think. I know it's very rough and very unedited but that will come in due time. Also please subscribe to my channel and you can see my beautiful face every Wednesday!! :)

Enjoy!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

What is this Feeling?

So sudden and new. I felt it the moment I laid eyes on you! Loathing!

Yes...I just quoted "Wicked"! Boo yah!

And I am loathing right now. It's the first time during this process that I've felt like WTF did I do! I can't do this, I can't do that...blah blah blah. I understand I "did it to myself"...but these are my feeling and it's probably dashed with a bit of PMS as well but nonetheless they're there...front and center.

First of all, let me say I DO NOT regret doing the surgery. I actually am very much glad I did it! Regret is not even in my mind. I believe my feelings are old habit feelings. Now that I can eat solid foods and things are staying down. But some foods and drinks I actually miss...like nachos, margaritas, beer, bacon cheeseburger, fries, slushees! I think I'm coming to a road in this process, that I'm feeling better...FINALLY. I'm down 51 lbs, my smaller clothes are fitting me, everyone is noticing. And I get excited!

But I still have "Fat Lydia" in my head. Not that she is bad but her choices in food clearly weren't the greatest. Hence reaching 377 lbs. So I've been battling my wants with what my body actually needs. I know I need at least 64 oz of water, my vitamins, protein, veggies and after that I don't really don't have room for anything else. But I still have those cravings in my head but most if the time I can handle them but for some reason as of lately they have been a wee bit stronger. Outside of this little battle...which I will conquer...everything else is doing fantastic.

I feel alive. I feel like I can actually PHYSICALLY take on the world. I have no pain. I don't get winded going up stairs. I feel like I've been brought back to life and not just coasting. Which is the best feeling to me in the whole wide world. So no matter what cravings I have...it's not strong enough for me to go back down that deadly road.

And once again for those who think this is the "easy way out" Kiss my ass. This shit is straight up hard...but like anything else that is that has it's challenges this one is well worth it.

"Food was your life, now fun is your life." Brent said that when I was bitchin about not being able to eat anything. And it made sense to me. Fun is my life now. And I'm having a blast with my baby tummy! lol :)

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Game Day

Well the day was 9/12/12. The day that my life really began.

I get up at 4:00 AM after tossing and turning and waking up every hour. I took my shower with the sterile soap that they gave me.

So we head out around 5ish. We arrive at the hospital, I get registered and sent up to 4th floor!

Then the fun begins! I get this sexy hospital gown along with tubes going in and out of me! And to top it all off I get the blue shower cap! Oh yeah ready for a good time!

At this point, to my surprise, I was pretty calm and ready to go.

So I say my "I love yous and see yas" to Brent, Elizabeth and my father in law.

I get wheeled to the back after they give me feel good medicine. I arrive in the OR and see big silver UFO shaped lights and next thing I know they are sticking this gas mask on me and telling me to take 5 deep breaths. I think I got to 3 or 4 and then I was out.

Next thing I know people were yelling at me to wake up in the Post-OP area and checking my stats and everything and I was good to go.

Well come to find out I thought it was like 9 or 10 am but it was 12! I was able to have people come back to see me, to make sure I was a-okay! Brent and my parents came back. And that's when I found out why it took so long. Brent told me the surgeon wasn't at one point sure if he could do it laparoscopically . Because since most of my fat is in my belly area, that caused my liver to be super fatty. And it was/would be in the way. But thankfully and luckily he was able to do it laparoscopically. Now I have 7 battle scars on me and I feel like 50 cent...the rapper.

I spent 3 days in the hospital...2 days to long. I was about to tell them throw me in the insane part of the hospital! I was straight up starting to get cabin fever! I was dirty, I was tired of being poke and prodded, and I was just plan tired. I wanted my own house and bed.

Now my time in the hospital was great. MUSC has been totally wonderful this whole process! Now my pain was relatively low. I don't think it got past a 5. I was walking the next day and getting the gas out of my belly. And the docs where impressed with my progress. So yay me!

So I went home and the transition was a wee bit harder than I thought. Not pain wise but the mental wise. It was a hard adjustment food wise. Nothing serious just like ooh okay I have to eat pureed foods...boo! But it's all good.

But I survived and I'm doing well. I'm really glad with my progress so far. I'm glad I've done it!

So that is my blog about my experience and I want to thank everyone for the prayers and positive thoughts and for just checking on me! Thanks y'all! :)

LJ

Days Before

I know this isn't the blog y'all want to read first but it's part of the process.

So last Monday 9/10 I went grocery shopping for after surgery...pretty much I'm suppose to eat pureed foods for the first month and then I can move on to introducing regular foods again! :) I'll be able to chew again! lol

While I was shopping with my buddy, Elizabeth. I was trolling around the store and looking at labels and processing this situation what was about to go down. Then it hit me...HOLY SHIT!!!! I was going to be having surgery in 2 days and what the heck was I getting into. The nerves started to take over. The thought of backing out actually ran threw my mind but I was like I've come to far and I'm not going back.

Most of Monday I was a weepy basket case. And then Tuesday I settled down, to some degree and then I got the call from the hospital about my of arrival time. I had to be there at 5:30 AM. I relaxed a bit and then I couldn't sleep that night...of course! :)

On to the next blog!

LJ

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

It's The Final Countdown

First of all I want to thank those who read or attempted to read my Ambien induced blog last time! Kudos to you! Because I'm leaving it the same because I find it HILRIOUS!!!! BAAAHAHHA!

Yes and in all my awesomeness I manage to get a Europe, the band, song title in my blog title. Yes as I said before awesome! :)

So those following this journey. And for those who are not read, No Witty Title.

Again I want to apologize for another blog brought to you by Ambien. So let's see what kind of trouble we can get into. I'm pretty alert right now but who knows as this progress! :)

To get everyone on the same page I have 2 weeks until my life gets even more awesome.

My surgery date is 9/12/12.

And today I had my pre-surgery appointment. I met with the Anesthesiologist aka Doogie Howser.
I seriously wondered if I was older than him! Yeah...Old people problems! :D

Doogie Howser came in towards in end of the game today but before I get ahead of myself, let me take you to the beginning!

I arrive early for my appointment...I'm shocked too!...I get checked in and wait...and wait...and...wait...and wait some more. Of course I swear I waited forever but it really was like 45 mins past my 10 am appointment. Doctor's office...go figure!

As I'm waiting I notice this CA-RAZY chick in a denim dress thing and sunglasses. For the record we were inside. She was staring at me the whole time...like evil creepy look. Then she started to cry...and I was like OMG! Seriously I've been waiting just as long. Then my nurse, in bleach white doctor's coat, comes bursting out of the doors and I was like HEY!! And she told me to stay put. She will fix this! Ummm okay! She said to follow her and I went a registered somewhere else and was sent off through the double doors.

I'm back wondering what the eff I'm doing. And I go to THAT desk to get checked in. I then was called into have my first EKG ever! So the nurse put all these stickies on my body and wires and ran things through a machine and swiggy lines came out of the machine and when asked if my heart looks good she nodded and said yes! I was like sweet! So I've screwed my heart up! Score!

Then I was sent over the blood drawing room. Now I HATE my blood getting sucked out of me. I'll do tattoos all day long BUT blood needles...NO! So I go in and get set up and cringe and she is done. I then go in a consultation room! ooooh fancy pants!  While I'm waiting and hanging out with Brent, in walks my most favorite person during this process Diana! She is the surgeons nurse and she is AWESOME! She is loud, funny, she calls you "Love", heaven forbid you call her "Ma'am"! She is all around awesome!!! And I wish EVERYONE could meet her! She'll make your day.

So she does through the routine questions, have to had this, have you had that, what drugs do you take, how's you activity level...etc etc. I then told her about one of my kidney's rebelling against me!!

OH! Yeah I forgot to mention, I have a small kidney infection. Thanks kidney for rocking an infection TWO WEEKS BEFORE SURGERY!!! You win organ of year!

Long story short I'm on antibiotics, I feel MUCHO MUCHO MUCHO better!! I can move around without feeling like I'm being stabbed in my side! Score!

I asked her is this going to screw with the surgery and she oh no! You're good! The doc in the box gave you 10 days to clear it up...you'll be fine! I said AWESOME! So she asks all her questions and we ask ours, and then she leaves and I see Debbie again! Debbie is one of the dietitians, She is amazing, she just wanted to make sure I have a game plan for when I get home and make sure my food, water, and walking is lined up! And being the type A person I am, I have it all set up!

Then Debbie left me and we met with Geri one of the nurses of the 6th floor. She is awesome and so sweet! She told us somethings to do and wanted to know if we had any questions and what not. We said no and she let and like a million minutes later in walked Doogie Howser.

He is part of the anaesthesia team. He ran through the day of surgery with me, seeing how I'm a surgery virgin! BAAAHAHAHA!

He pretty much said I'm healthy. I'll be going under general anesthesiology. He said he sees no problem with me going or coming out of it. He actually said he's seem bigger patients than me and some that are on a hell of alot of meds! I told him that's why I'm doing this...so it doesn't get to that point! He was happy with my lungs, throat, and breathing. He said I was good to go! :)

Soooo now that just leaves the surgery! I'll write about that one when it happens! :)

until next time! LJ

Monday, August 13, 2012

ONE MOOOOOONTH!

*RUNS AROUND THE HOUSE SCREAMING...OOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEE MOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHH* EEEeeeeeeee

Okay now that's out of my system...let me confess one more thing.

This blog is brought to by the letter, "A" as in Ambien. So I'm not quite sure what "Awake" Lydia will think of this blog but let's go for it anyways. I hope it's funny witty and not funny like WTF Lydia really?

Clarification: I take Ambien to help me sleep...my mind doesn't shut off...it goes and goes and goes. I have a lot going, so my mind doesn't shut off.

I'd like to announce that I have less than a month until Lydia 2.0 emerges from her cocoon of fat. To take of my world and kick ass and be bad ass. Turn myself into a runner, a marathoner, and good ole healthy. Whoop whoop!

I'm sure some of y'all are probably wondering if I'm scared. Honestly yeah the thought crossed mind from time to time and I just realize what I'm doing this for, I'm doing this for a healthy life for me and my family.

And really the only thing that as me kind of nervous about is the anesthesia. And I'm only worried about that because the nurse mentioned that you would become constipated. And I don't want that because I don't want my new guts to burst. The likelihood of that happening probably not likely. But we can think my over active imagination for that one! :D

I had 1 of my 2 nutrition classes and learned so much! Nina at MUSC is AWESOME!!! She broke it down to this is how the first month is going to go. You'll be eating pureed foods. I got a booklet and it gives 2 weeks of how your day should roughly go. I was like SWEET! Guidelines. I'm there!

Also she never mentioned food that I wouldn't be able to eat...except chicken skin, bacon, turkey bacon, hot dogs, vienna sausages, SPAM. So I was like the only thing I'm going to really miss is bacon and hot dogs. So I think I'll be alright. And who knows once I get to know my new stomach, we can try it later down the road.

The other thing she said was don't fry your foods, but that doesn't mean you can have them either. Once in awhile...and if you want maximum weight loss results don't eat.

I felt like I could have the healthier smarter choice and be so content and happy. She said no fried food and sugar foods/drinks. Because my body will make itself sick. Its called "dumping syndrome". I basically get really light headed, cold sweats, gas, and some people have thrown up and its gone the other way.

I say right now I kind of like the fact I'm going to have something in me that will be like "hey moron why did you eat THAT, I'm going to make you sick! BAAHAHAHA"

But long story short I'm super excited and stoked for 9-12-2012 to come! I'm ready for this challenge and ready to held it head on.

:)

If there are grammatical boos, I'll fix them when I'm not on Ambien! :)

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Looking Forward To...

Before I move on to the subject of this blog...if you haven't read the latest one. For shame! But here is the link. Read "No Witty Title" before reading this one. :) K...thanks! :)

"No Witty Title"

So DON'T READ THIS PART! ;)

As mentioned in the previous blog, I've been APPROVED. The idea is settling in and I'm getting sooo super excited. AAAHHH!! Yay! So these are the last six weeks of me being deadly obese. I understand I'm going to be "obese" for a good while...but not deathly obese. So touche! :)

Then I got to thinking about all the blog possibilities that are going to be going on. Weight loss update blogs, pain blogs, what did I get myself into blogs, and OMG can I really eat JUST that and be full blogs.

And this one might be my favorite blog...I got the idea from my RNY Talk Forum. Someone posted a topic of "What are you looking forward to after the surgery?" And everyone had such awesome things they wanted to do from skydiving...not my cup of tea to just being to shop in a "normal" clothing store. I got the bright idea to blog about mine "Looking forward tos"

I'm Looking Forward To...
EVERYTHING!!
I'm looking forward to being under 200 lbs.
I'm looking forward to kicking ass.
I'm looking forward to FINALLY get into my career. I want to be a Zumba and spinning instrutor.
I'm looking forward to going to Disney and being able to ride the rides. Instead of being worried if I would fit.
I'm looking forward to getting my style back. Instead of wearing my infamous gross basketball shorts.
I'm looking forward to not sweating like a damn pig! I sweat soooooo much and I'm jsut standing there. I understand its hot but my sweating is INSANE!
I'm looking forward to spawning the cutest kids this world has seen. :)
I'm looking forward to running and spinning without feeling like I'm going to die or my knee is going to burst!
I'm looking forward to my Buddha belly not getting in the way of me tying my shoes.
I'm look forward to my 30th birthday party next year! :) You best believe I will be sporting one slinky, sexy, and bangable dress. Just saying! :)
I'm looking forward to actually not really having food be the center of my universe. I know it will always before there. I know the surgery/beginning of eating again will be rough but I will actually know when to stop. Hence my issue now.
I'm looking forward to being active again.
I'm looking forward to adding years to my life.
I'm looking forward to dancing again.
I'm looking forward to wearing heels.
I'm looking forward to wearing a bathing suit more comfortibly.
I'm looking forward to passing good healthy habits to our spawns.
I'm looking forward to not getting winded when I go up stairs or just walking from my car to the store.
I'm looking forward to getting back to feeling comfortable in my skin. Instead of wondering how I get here and this isn't my body.
I'm looking forward to wearing my wedding rings again.
I'm looking forward to being super duper happy and proud of myself.
I'm looking forward to not feeling like I'm getting stared at because of my weight.
I'm looking forward to kids not asking their parents if I have a baby in my stomach. True story.
I'm looking forward to sleeping much better and maybe not snoring! *Fingers crossed on that one*
I'm looking forward to wearing clothes from the website. Super Cute Clothes!

So that's just what I can think of right now. I'm sure this list will continue to grow. But don't get this list twisted with the journey I'm about to undertake. I know it will be hard, I know it's surgery, I know these things but for the outcome will be well worth it.

Until next time! :)

Thursday, July 26, 2012

No Witty Title

Well let me first start off by saying congrats to my sister and brother in law on the birth of the cutest niece E-V-E-R!!!! Maddie was born 7/26/2012 at 4:47 am. She's my Maddie waddie!!

No drama about my weight loss surgery journey. No witty...in my opinion witty...post about hating insurance companies...or at least mine. No more eating everything...including the kitchen sink. No more old HORRIBLE eating habits that has crept back into my daily life.

So let me recap the latest installment of this journey.

As y'all know I was denied by my "insurance company"...CIGNA.
But again I'm over it and trying to move on from being rejected and the bruised ego.
I promised no wittiness...sorry.

On Monday I was voluntold by my boss to go to an insurance Q&A.
Thanks Johnny...let's add salt to the wound...

So me and my buddy trekked over to another store to talk about insurance, on a truck day none the less. That's a different rant altogether. We got over to the other HT and I'm there with some of my floral buddies and other HT employees. And in walks Terri, who is HT's benefits lady. She is the go to between HT and Cigna. She sooooooooooooo nice. I think she is wonderful...very helpful...and very informative.

She went on with the Q&A and I went on...in my head...bitching about being there and about being denied for whatever stupid reason. Grumble grumble grumble. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm at an insurance Q&A...why not ask about my denial letter. Man I tell you I'm a GENIUS. But I didn't want other people knowing my business...but I write a blog...not the most sound logic but whatever. Before the meeting was over this lady, that works at another store, started talking about how she got the gastric bypass surgery and dealing with her insurance company at the time. I was like wow seriously...if I wasn't meant to be here. Go figure.

Once the meeting got over with I went up to Terri and told her my sob story...not really...I just gave her straight facts and asked if there was something she could do. She took my info and said she would call me back. So I was like cool, and went back to work.

Didn't think she would actually call me but she did. Unfortunately I didn't pick up because the number she was calling from was "unknown" and I didn't know if it was going to be a creeper on the other line. So she left a message and we began our game of phone tag.

Still haven't heard anything as of today.

But I did get another phone call today.

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

And it was MUSC calling me back. I was like yay! Hopefully they have an answer from Cigna about my denial.

Susan said "Lydia, I was just calling to let you know that you've been APPROVED by Blue Cross Blue Shield!!!!" I started crying. Really, Lydia...crying? But I told her thank you thank you thank you!!!! She has made my day! Not only was my cutest niece born today, I got approved. And Susan said I love making these phone calls.

Susan said "Well I won't keep you long since you have to get back to your niece. So we are going to just set up your surgery date and your pre surgery exam." I was like heck yeah! The moment I've been waiting for!! :)

So I have surgery set for September 12, 2012. *Happy dance!!!!*

Then the fun will REALLY begin. Not to say this approval part hasn't been fun! :)

I'm sure those blogs will be insane. I'm ready though. I'm ready to get back and really focus on what I want to get from my life. A good loooooooooong healthy life...with a wonderful hubby and eventually kids.

Until next time.

Oooooh man I've only got like 6 weeks!!! YAY!!!!!

Friday, July 20, 2012

Whiskey...Tango...Foxtrot...

So it's taken a couple days to write this blog mainly because I didn't want to write it. And also work has been slightly busier for me. I'm being trained for a new spot in the store...I'm hoping this will be a good change for me. I'll still be doing floral, but I'll be in this spot one day a week...until I can find a permanent spot for me at that store or another.

On to the meat of the blog...

I went to work on Tuesday to train for my new spot and as I was leaving I got a call from the hospital...

YAY!!!! I thought. Finally they'll tell me I got myself a date with the surgeon and everything is going fabulously according to my plan!

Susan, at the hospital, told me I would be getting a letter saying I was DENIED!!!!!!!!!!!!! *falls out of my chair*

Yes...my "wonderful" insurance company doesn't see how 370 lbs is worthy of having surgery. Seriously?

But Susan said don't worry. This happens all the time with your insurance company. Apparently my insurance in the bane of every one's existence. And I can see why.

So she wanted to ask me some quick questions for the appeal. Yes...MUSC is appealing. Yes...good news. Susan asked about my 6 month diet last year with my doctor. She asked if I went in March because in the doctor's notes show me going in February and then April to August. That's 6 months but they catch is they have to be 6 months together...consecutively. There's the catch!

She also asked about Brent's insurance...so the hospital is going to try there also.

BUT DAMN IT! I thought I was a shoe in. I thought I did EVERYTHING they wanted. But alas the other shoe dropped.

Best case scenario, it comes back approved. YAY!!! Surgery is still on!! Whoop whoop!
Worst care scenario, I wait 6 months, do the diet each month back to back, and then have surgery early 2013.

Either way the surgery is going to happen. But damn it!!!

So after I cried to Brent, saying I'm never going to have this happen. This is not going according to my plans. I did this with the whole ugly cry and everything! I was a hot mess!

He told me to skip bells for the night and go to the support group, because I can start going before the surgery. So I went...sort of reluctantly. I walked in there, looked at everyone and instantly became the green eyed monster. All these people have had their surgeries and why can't my stupid mother effin insurance work right. Why do I have to have the retarded insurance company? What is it about me and my stupid backwards dumb effin insurance company, that doesn't see 370 lbs on a 5'4 frame is a health risk?! UMMMM HELLO!?!?! Let's add my high blood pressure. Yeah! Well it was alittle high because I was super nervous at the hospital!

Then Linda walked in and all was right in my world. I was in the right place and the right time. She came in saw my "new" face and came over and just started talking to me. I was sitting and sulking on the back row. This woman has lost 126 pounds and had energy, personality, and I love her! She showed me her before and after pictures. And I got all teary eyed and told her my story and she was like honey it's alright MUSC saved my life and they're fighting for you.

And this other lady...I'll get her name next time...was one row in front of me and she has a weight loss of 210 pounds!!! WHAT! I was floored! She looked amazing! She said MUSC is here for you and they're going to get you approval. They're such wonderful people here, she said.

So yeah I'm sooooo glad I went to the support group, and I can't wait until I go back!

That's the latest on the surgery front and Susan said I should hear something in a shorter time than 4 weeks, with cigna's answer to the appeal. So keep praying and good vibes that this works this time and if not than...I guess my ass is going to make some heads roll! :)

Signing out! Lydia


Friday, July 13, 2012

Get to Know Lydia

Yes...Hi...I'm Lydia and I'm still alive. :) I know I haven't blogged much but I kind of feel like I'm at place where I have nothing to blog about. So I figured I would do a "Get to Know Lydia" blog until I hear something about my surgery.

Real quick on that front...I'm still pending. But I did however send in Brent's insurance today because that headache finally got straighten out. I must say I love Sara Lee/Bimbo Bakery...they have been way awesome and super helpful during "Insurance Gate 2012".

I asked Lisa, at the hospital, on what's the deal with not hearing anything. And she pretty much said my insurance is the one of the slowest if not the slowest on getting back to the hospital. So my first thought was great I have dumbasses for an insurance company but than I took it back quickly because I don't want to jinx myself and send bad juju. Come on it's Friday the 13th...bad juju is out there. But I do have a sense of calm after that talk. I do honestly have nothing bad to say about the people I've met on the new journey. They rock my face off.

I feel an answer is coming soon...I just need to stay positive and not get so damn impatient! OOOOH why isn't that a virtue of mine! Damn Marshall/Monroe genes! :) Curses. Anyways so please keep sending good vibes and prayers. I feel them and I know Cigna does also! :)

Now on to the "Get to Know Lydia" phase of this blog.

I know most of y'all reading this are family and friends...so you can skip ahead or exit now. :)
But for those who I've met on Twitter and RNYtalk, I figured I'd let y'all into my world.

:)

I'm Lydia and I'm probably the biggest dork/nerd you'll ever meet. I'm random at times...most times. I'm super loud and very gregarious. I've been told my laugh is loud and infectious.

Maybe I'll post a video blog with me just laughing and y'all can hear it! BAAAHAHAHAHA!

I'm bubbly, I'm a huge goofball with a wicked sense of humor. I'll laugh at fart jokes or witty sarcastic jokes. I got one for you!

Q - "What does a nosy pepper do?"
A - "Gets Jalapeno Business" 

BAAHHAHAHAHAHA You know you're dying laughing or shaking your head!

I love to dance and can't wait for these pounds to start coming off and freeing me from my cage of fat. I'm a bit on the dramatic side but I totally make up for it with HUMOR!

I love to laugh and make other people laugh at their expense and sometimes mine.

I'm in love with the best guy EVER. So far my favorite roles I'm planning in life right now; are wife and BEST AUNT EVER! I love my wittle Alex and soon to be wittle Maddie.

But Wife is a lovely fit on me...I think. Brent is the best and he totally puts up with my wild and crazy antics...as I do his. Let's just say there is never a dull moment...EVER. I love you baby times 3!

And when I write in caps that's how I would say it in real life. I'm super animated.

I love fair food. Funnel cakes are the bomb dot com along with cheeseburgers and fries.

I love music. Right now I'm reliving my teen years with 90s R&B. But I range anywhere from the 50s to Now and everything genre in between.

I really am that awesome. I want kids one because I know I would be one bad ass mom! I would raise my spawn like I was raised. You better be home before street lights come on or you will get beat. Good ole southern old school raising! :)

I'm obsessed with PINK, Vera Bradley, and Hello Kitty. I'm in love with my iPhone. I'm the best mama to my furbabies...I love my Sally Wally and Reesy Peesy!

I'm a florist and just got employee of the 3rd quarter! Again shows my awesomeness!

I'm going to be a writer and my grammar SUCKS! :) But I chalk it up to my charm and personality! :)

I'm so loving the website www.modcloth.com
That's where I'll be shopping once at goal weight...just like my cool twitter friends! <3

I have the best family and in-laws a girl could ask for! I heard horror stories about crazy in-laws or if my family would be crazy in-laws to Brent. But both families are absolutely amazing and I'm one lucky gal!

My friends are super amazing and wonderful and I love and cherish them dearly.

I love shoes also. More walking/running shoes. But I just saw a pair of teal and white heels with a peacock feather painted on a pair of pumps on www.modcloth.com
MUST GET!!!

So that's me in a nut shell. Just your above average gal in an average world.

Until next time! :)

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Welp...That's It...

First and foremost I want to thank y'all for being so sweet and supportive during this process. So thanks to all my friends and family!

So if your following this crazy journey; you know that I had a psychologist appointment on Tuesday, June 19, 2012. And it went really well! I loved it, Dr. Serber is amazing. She made me feel relaxed, and we just talked about everything. The fact I'm nervous about this HUGE change that's about to go down. The fact I'm going to see what life is like with a "1" in front of my weight. I don't even remember when I had a "1" in front of my weight. Maybe when I was born! HAHAHA! Just kidding...maybe. :) She mentioned the fact she didn't want me to sabotage myself because of that fear. She believes that I can kick ass and lose an ass load of weight...my words of course...but you get the idea. And I know I can but to hear a complete stranger...a medical professional. It was very encouraging. Then we did all these "how do you learn" test...I mean tasks...her words not mine. :) A brief sample; she reads a story to me and I had to recite it back to her. Well let's just say that test.."task"...was a bust. :) lol I'm a complete and total visual learner. I can't remember what I did yesterday, how am I suppose to tell you about some fire in Cleveland; where a hotel and restaurant burned down before the fire fighters could get to them. Seriously... :)
But she gave me draw the picture you see test, then at the end she made me draw it again. I nailed that bitch both times! :) lol Then it was resiting numbers and fruits and after 4 hours my brain was throbbing! It's been awhile since my brain was challenged like that.

After we talked about everything, she said I look good...mentally. She said I have a good head on my shoulder, I have a good game plan for after surgery, I have a great support system...i.e. my family, friends, and twitter/facebook lovelies! :) So she said I was good to go. Check this off my list. One more under my belt!

Then today came, Thursday June 21, 2012. THE day...meeting my surgeon face to face, meeting my dietitian face to face and the last step before my information gets sent up for final approval and then I'll be getting a surgery date.

So the day began with me helping, my wonderful and supportive, hubby so he could be there with me. Then we parted and we met downtown at the hospital. I get checked in, and everyone at MUSC is so wonderful and sweet...FYI. They called me back to check my stats...weight, height, blood pressure...etc. I apparently shorter than I thought...boo! I'm 5'4 and 370 lbs...I can only imagine all the stress on my body. But not for long...hopefully.

Then they put me in this room and I meet with the dietitian...we just went over what we talked about on the phone. She was sweet, Debbie is her name and getting me healthy is her game. Sweet...I like that game. Then Diana came in! Now she has been my favorite. She was funny, put me at ease, knowledgeable, and just all around very helpful. So after a few minutes the man of the hour came in. The one that is going to give me the tool to get this weight under control...for good. Dr. Pullat! YAY!!! He came in, we talked, asked questions, and decided that RNY gastric bypass is the best option for me. I have the ability to lose about 170 pounds. Let me explain that 1-7-0 POUNDS! Yes an average size MAN! OMG! So after we talked squared things away. I went and had blood work done just to make sure I didn't have any thyroid issues or vitamin deficiencies.

So it's out of my hands now. All the medical people I've met have all agreed this will help me..110% hands down. They're passing it on for final approval from Cigna and this is where I'm going to need all the feel good thoughts and prayers. Because Cigna is well Cigna. :) But Diana said they at MUSC fight and usually get approval with Cigna...after they get a hold of someone!

Here I am asking for positive thoughts/prayers/sacrifices/shady deals/hexes/good magic...etc that everything pans out. And also patience for me during this time! :)

So that's all for now! :)

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Am I Crazy?

HAHAHAHA! Well that's depending on who you ask! :) But we'll see what the psychologist has to say on Tuesday June 19, 2012.

Yeah that's right, as in NEXT FRICKIN TUESDAY! "Hey Lydia isn't your surgeon meet and greet on Thursday?" Why yes...yes it is! So I have both of my final appointments before my stuff gets sent up for approval to the insurance in the same week. This process is coming together FAST. I think faster than I put the weight on! LOL! So I could possibly have my surgery sooner than I thought. SWEET! And not so sweet.

You see I do want this to happen but I don't want it to go TO fast where I freak the eff out. And scare the baJesus out of myself. You know for those who are new to the "Lydia Show", I'm a very much "Type A" personality.

According to Wikipedia (a legit sight...I know) "The theory describes a Type A individual as ambitious, rigidly organized, highly status conscious, can be sensitive, care for other people, are truthful, impatient, always try to help others, take on more than they can handle, want other people to get to the point, proactive, and obsessed with time management. People with Type A personalities are often high-achieving "workaholics" who multi-task, push themselves with deadlines, and hate both delays and ambivalence."

Yeah than add in my ADD and its a lovely combo! :) Contraction I know..call me a Starburst! :oP

Anyways I like a plan. I like to know how I'm going to get to Point "A" to Point "E". I don't necessarily have to follow the plan I start with but I do HAVE  to know what's going on and what I'm getting into..and all the dirty and gritty details. As Brent called it tonight "to much information". I like to call it well informed. Tomato...TomAto.

But I freaked myself out tonight thinking about how much my life is going to change. As I told Brent, being overweight is all I know/remember. I can remember being a size woman's 14 in MIDDLE SCHOOL and it clearly increased over the years. So let's do the math for roughly more than half my life...from what I can remember...I've been overweight. So when all this weight is gone...it's going to be me and my sassy self. Nothing to hide behind or shield me from the world. I'll be "exposed". That's scares the ever loving God out of me. Let me express that one more time...THAT SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME.

Don't get me wrong...I'm not backing out...I'm not changing my mind...I'm just a little scared of the unknown. But who isn't right? I know this is going to be the best thing for me. It's going to change my life in soooooo many ways. I'm actually going to be a healthy "normal" person. I'm going to be able to prevent the onslaught of obesity related diseases. I'm going to be able to create spawns of me and Brent. I'm going to be able to go upstairs and wipe my ass without getting winded. I'm going to able to shop at normal 20something/30something stores...aka Walmart! ;) And most of all I get to live a long and health life with the man, that is my BFF and the love of my life. And drive him crazy like any good wife would do!

So when those pros are stacked against my one mental block. Things don't look half bad! On to see the crazy doctor!

Autobots roll out.

LJ

Sunday, June 10, 2012

So it Begins...

The ball for the surgeries that is.

This is the blog y'all been waiting for.

So a lot has actually happened since the Tuesday info session.

I found out at the info session they do take Cigna and since I had a supervised diet with my doctor last year it's still good. I can use that. So my time for surgery...if approved...will come a little quicker than normal.

Here's a little bit...I'm actually really excited that my battle with obesity could be coming to an end and I'll be living a healthy life. :)

And for the record, those who think this is the "easy way out", I'm afraid you are sadly mistaken. The process to get to surgery is a long and tedious one. And let's not forget to mention of the actual surgery itself. Then the complete overhaul of my former eating habits/lifestyle. But I'll actually see results and feel better again. I'll be Sassier, Styleisher, and Sexier! BOOOYAH! :)

Now on to the details of the past week.

Well I finished filling out my paperwork on Wednesday and went to go drop it off and the office. Well since the hospital is downtown, and I am a horrible driver downtown...I got like major driving anxiety trying to drop of my paperwork. After 15-20 mins of driving around in a parking garage and then getting turned around and LEAVING downtown. Finally I said screw it and left and ended up mailing.

I got a missed call on Thursday, and listened to the message it was Lisa, from MUSC! WHAT!?!? So I called back. She said since I had Cinga I would need a letter of medical necessity and my records for the supervised diet from last year faxed over.

So I call my regular Dr. and took care of all that.

Before I got off the phone with Lisa, she said the dietitian and behavior health department would call me either on Friday or early next week.

I didn't think anything of it and figured they would call me early next week. Well I got a call from the dietitian on Friday and we talked for about 20 minutes and went over all my eating habits and she gave me some homework. Now I knew my eating habits have gotten OOC...out of control. But once we talked about them...I was like DAMN it all makes sense. My portions are insane but the wrong foods totally don't help it. And she told me to scope the store and pretty much get familiar with the produce section again and be aware of when I go out. So she's trying to take me off going out. Which is part of the reason for my obesity.

Once we got done she told me I can attend weight loss surgery support groups anytime. And I need to attend 2 nutrition meetings before surgery. Then she said that she'll pass on my info to Lisa and they'll call me and set up a meeting with one of the surgeons. I thought since it was Friday and almost quitting time that I would hear from them on Monday. Well to my surprise they called me back pretty quickly and I was able to set up and meet and greet with one of the surgeons! I set up an appointment for June 21 with Dr. Pullat! He was the one that did the info session and he was pretty great! :)

So everything seems to be falling into place. Continue to send your prayers and good vibes. And now I just need to meet with the crazy head doctor and then it gets sent up for approval!! YIKES!!

I can't believe its coming together! I'm soooooo excited!

LJ





Tuesday, June 5th 2012

So after 3 weeks I finally have something to talk about! Baahahahaha! I never thought that 3 weeks would go by...it felt like it was going on F-O-R-E-V-E-R!

So fast forward to Tuesday, June 5th. As many. if not all of y'all know I went to an info session at the other hospital that day. It was really good because Brent was able to come with me this time and hear everything that I've been researching and telling him about. But it cool and informative that he heard from someone in the medical field...that does this for a living.

We go in after going to the wrong building...DOH!..I like freaking out OMG we're going to be late...must not freak out. We arrive and this lady is talking and I'm like CRAP! So I open this HUGE metal door and of course it's loud and obnoxious. We walk in and I'm like I'm sorry...sorry..excuse me...sorry. Then the lady, come to find out her name is Susan, said we we're not late. And she handed me my packet to fill out with my patient infomation.

Then the Dr. comes in. He was really nice. I actually liked him along with everyone in the MUSC bariatric department.

Here is the website:
http://www.muschealth.com/weightlosssurgery/index.htm

So what the Dr. talked about was the same thing that the other hospital talked about. The pros and the cons of each surgery.

But two reasons for Tuesday was so Brent could hear the information and feel comfortable with the surgeries. And I had to attend to continue with the program.

That's all! Stay tuned writing the next blog..NOW!

LJ

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Access Denied

Well I got my first bit of bad news down this weight loss journey.

As y'all know I went to an info session at one of the local hospital...hospital "A". Well they took my insurance information there to see if they would cover the surgery.

I got a call for the hospital and so did my friend, and she said that the hospital was calling to let her know that her insurance does cover the surgery so bring you medical info papers on by. I was like that's awesome, congrats...yay!!!

So I was thinking maybe they called me with good news. Well we were at work so I didn't have my phone on me. But when I checked my messages and I had a voicemail from the hospital!! OMG...is the process really going to get started!!

I called her back and she was on the other line. So I waited and waited. I was getting nervous. FINALLY she called me back. And she said that my insurance didn't cover it at THAT hospital because it was an "out of network" carrier. BALLS! Damn you Cigna! Can't say that I'm surprised I knew that hospital and Cigna didn't play nice with each other. So I didn't get my hopes up to high. But lady at hospital "A" was so sweet and she said she even tried to get them to cover it with an out of network co-pay and my insurance was like no.

But I do see a positive out of this situation. The lady at hospital "A" said that Cigna does cover the Bariatric surgeries. So it was good news to hear that coming from a hospital insurance departmart. So yay!

Now as I mentioned before I do have another info session at THE hospital for weight loss surgeries on June 5th. And my family doctor is a branch of that hospital and Cigna plays nice with them. Now if this one doesn't go through I'll be more upset, but I still have Brent's insurance to try. So I still have options but it looks like the surgeries are the way I'm going. I've still be researching, and I even downloaded "Weight Loss Surgery for Dummies" to my Kindle! So I'm becoming a fountain of knowledge for this stuff!

So please, if your a one to pray, send some my way for patience and if you aren't the praying type just send good vibes!!

Well keep you updated! :)

Excellent Candidate

Hi, I'm Lydia Johnston and I'm your next weight loss surgery candidate. More information to follow!

Wooohooo!

So as y'all know I've broken things off with Weight Watchers and looking into the weight loss surgeries. I researched, youtubed, went to an info session at one of the hospitals here, and talked with my regular doctor.

I've engulfed my time and energy to knowing what I can about these surgeries right now. I still have questions and I still have another hospital to check out. And apparently this is THE hospital in this area for Bariatric surgeries. They called me...okay I'm getting ahead of myself...rewind....

Last week Thursday I went to an info session at one of the local hospitals down here and got information up to my eyeballs about these surgeries. Talk informative...well I guess that's the point of these things. DUH! But the doctor went through the pros and cons of each surgery and talked about the Bariatric program at hospital "A". I was honestly really impressed. I got a good vibe from the doctor, he calmed my nerves. He was easy going and I could see myself possibly going with him.

So I left 2 hours later with knowledge busted from my seams and I wanted to shout to the world. But alas Brent was asleep and well I wasn't to far behind him. :) Old married lady sleeping habits.

On that Friday, I went to my regular doctor to talk to her about what I was thinking, if she thought anything else or had any other ideas on weight loss. And she told me that she thought I had the right mind set and that I was an excellent candidate. I was really, for some reason, shocked. I felt a sense of relief, excitement, and hope. I mean according to the research I had done, I thought I was but to hear those words come from my doctor was awesome. Someone in the medical community saw and thought like me. Okay first of all kind of scary and second of all kind of cool! :)

Then the nerves set in...OH CRAP. I'm really considering this. This pieces are falling into place. My insurance approves the weight loss surgeries, my doctor thought I was an excellent candidate, and my doctor referred me to THE hospital for the surgeries. Since my doctor's office is a family branch of THE hospital. One thing she mentioned was she thought there might be a weight limit of the lap band but she said the gastric sleeve surgery is just as effective. With that surgery they take 3/4 of your stomach and form the remaining part into a sleeve. Its the middle of the road surgery. You have 3 to choose from, lap band (less abrasive), gastric sleeve (middle of the road), and gastric bypass surgery (balls to the wall intense). But I'm leaning towards the sleeve.

So I left with alot of knowledge and alot to think about. I'm actually stoked this is all coming together. Anyways now that you're all updated I got a call for THE hospital for an info session with them on June 5th. I'm soooo excited because I'm pretty sure my insurance will cover this hospital! Yay!!!

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Time to Say Goodbye

Dear Weight Watchers,

This isn't easy and I'll probably shed a few tears but I think that it's time we both go our separate ways. Don't get me wrong, I think you are a great and wonderful program but for some reason I am hitting a brick wall and need something bigger than the both of us.

You have showed me who I really can be. You showed me what it feels like to be healthy and happier than I am now. But the roads we are taking now are completely different now and I know you will continued to be a successful and grow and change with the times and people. But I need to explore other avenues of weight loss...which has led me to looking into weight loss surgeries. I know whatever I decide will be a great choice for me. And I hope you understand. It's not you, it's me. :)

So thank you for 5 wonderful and crazy years but it time to close this chapter to begin writing a new one.

I can't say anything negative about you, you were the best and you know that hence your major success.
So thank you. I feel that's not enough for all that has been shown to me. My eyes have been open to a world that I never thought I would "fit" into and you showed I can. Thank you.

But I've let go and now i'ts time for you to do the same. I will have nothing but love and respect in my heart and soul for you. You and I made an awesome team.

Lovingly Always,
Lydia


Monday, May 7, 2012

Baby Step

As mentioned before my weight loss journey has taken a slight turn to the left and well I'm going to see where this road takes me.

I looking into getting the lap band surgery. I feel this is the best option for me. It's not as serious at gastric, I'll be in the hospital for 1-2 days. We can still have babies when that time comes...which is the one thing I was wondering about. I would hate to go through this surgery and either balloon back up or not have kids. But I would be able to with the band, the doctor would just loosen it to where I would have enough food for me and baby. Again...no babies...just future talk.

Also the one thing I was worried about is that my insurance wouldn't cover it and well I called today and it turns out they DO cover it. And I'm then next going to talk to my doctor about the option, see if I qualify on that side. According to all the Internet medical lap band sites and forums I qualify...found out I have a BMI of 62...how depressing.

Anyways not focusing on that BMI but like I said before I researched and will continue to research until the process end hits a dead end or I get done. And Brent and I are both on the same page about it...he even mentioned that if the insurance didn't cover he would go take out a loan. I'm really blessed to have such a wonderful hubby, that would do that! I love him!

But again I understand that its not a miracle fix, it will take hard work, dedication, and gym time...along with a few blood, sweat and tears. I honestly feel that this is the route I'm suppose to take. During the research they said the average stomach holds 6 cups of food...and I know mine holds WAY more than that. I would go down to 1/2 a cup...wow...but I know the risks and side effects will be worth it to add 30 or more years on to my life. Because at the rate I'm going I'll be sent to an early grave. So it was time to consider something else to go along with Weight Watchers.

Yes I will still continue to do Weight Watchers. Because we all know it works...its just some of us need a small bit more help than others.

Again I hope you stay tune for this next chapter!

Turn Left, TURN LEFT!

Okay so as you know my weight loss, has been well more of a weight gain. Clearly it's because I'm not eating the right foods and exercising on a regular basis. But I've been thinking of why or what else I can do to get it right.

The why is because I'm in a different place in my life right now. I know I've touched on this before but it seems to be a huge factor on why I'm not losing. I mean I'm 28, almost 29. I'm taking care of a family and myself. My time is spread thin and I honestly rather spend it with my husband, family and friends, than at the gym or worrying about food. And then there is work, oh work...work...work...work. Le sigh. My job now is a complete 180 degrees different from what I was doing the first time with Weight Watchers. I'm a "manager" now. I have a department, I work by alone, by myself...which I love. But unfortunately it takes a lot of my time...like most people. But when I get home, after a 20 minute drive. The only thing I want to do it get home and spend what little time I can with my hubby before he goes to bed at 6pm. So during that small time frame, around an hour to hour and half...dinner needs to be cooked, and eaten. So unfortunately we rely a lot on fast food...drive thru. I know not health and I could make better options but alas drive thru is a weakness of mine, an Achille's heel. I feel as if I'm NEVER going to eat at this place again. So I HAVE to order everything on the menu, 2 meals...etc. Yeah a bit backwards and totally sabotaging the bigger picture.

Which brings me to something that I've been thinking about for awhile and have researched all weekend.

I saw a Dr. Oz episode a few months back talking about weight loss surgeries, mainly gastric bypass. Saying how these surgeries aren't what they use to be and have come along way from what they're perceived. That got the gears going, maybe that's what I need at this point in my life, when I have the scales creeping slowly and deathly to 400lbs. *gulp* Then talking with the hubby, because nothing is for free in this world. We came to the conclusion that I can do it by myself, I DID it before by myself. Plus I've always been against surgery for myself. Plus my ego is to prideful...Leo problems I guess. ;)

Fast forward to the tail of last week. I was talking with a co-worker, about weight loss and how it's kind of just slowly creeping up and how this is hurting and that's hurting. She shared that she's going to Disney in June and won't be able to ride the rides, and she loves that. But she has also put on the weight and is on medicine for blood pressure. So we got to talking about different things for weight loss and what we need to fix. And she mentioned her doctor asked her to check out this weight loss group session at a local hospital and I told her I would go with her. So we have in the works and then she mentioned how she wanted to get the lap band surgery. And I was like oooh you don't hear about that one as much, I know for me all I hear is about know about is gastric surgery.

So I carry on and went about my day went home and went about my business on Friday. I work, and then the hubby called me to let me know he was on the way home at 10 AM...bastard...I was only 2 hours into my shift...boo hissssss!

Anyways I asked if I went to the gym that morning, grumbled nooooo....
He was like baby...you know you need to go...
I confessed that I hadn't been sleeping and I really just wanted to sleep.
He told me understood but he was also really concerned about my weight and want us to live a long happy life. So I'm going to really stop smoking and you, you really should look at other means to help lose the weight. Like those weight loss surgeries...maybe lap band.
I responded with the Tim Taylor, monkey side...WHAT?! Are you in my head? I've honestly been processing this idea in my head before I brought the idea up to you. We were meant to be together! lol
His response Lucky me....
lol

But in all seriousness I feel as if my weight loss journey has taking me to this point. I know its going to be just as challenging but at least my portion sizes will be check. And I can train my brain to correctly recognize the signals and work Weight Watchers also.

So I hope y'all will continue to follow and support me as my weight loss journey takes a turn to the left. TURN LEFT.

"Weigh In" 5/1/12 & 5/8/12

Well I had a gain last week and I'll have a gain tomorrow. i don't know what else to say except that my weight loss has taking a turn a different, new blog about that shortly. there is nothing to say except read the next blog! :)

Weigh in 4/24/12

so i lost 3 poounds this week! whoop whoop. not really sure what i did. i know i had a couple proms and working alot of crazy hours but wasn't able to hit the gym or prepare my meals. nothing else to report. on to the next blog! :)

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

5K/10K Beast

As many of you know I participated in a 10K about a month ago!

Sorry I'm late I'm doing a blog on it! :)  Can y'all find in your heart to forgive me!? :)

I woke up a 4:30 am, took a shower so I won't stink as bad when I finished, met up with my new 5K/10K buddy Allison. We got to our starting point at 6 AM. We lined up at 7:00 and waited and waited and waited for the race to start at 8. Well there for 43,000 people so they had to start in waves. And we were 3 to the last group. So we waited and waited and waited some more. And we didn't start walking/running 9:45! Apparently there was a mix up with buses and runners/walkers in the beginning. I think it boiled down to them not having enough buses to transport the runners/walkers.

As we inched closer to the beginning of the line, I started to get SUPER pumped. I started to get teary eyed and really couldn't believe I was actually going to do this...a 10K. I've NEVER done a 10K...6.2 miles. The last "K", I did was 4 years ago. I'm out of shape and out of sync with my body. Honestly the day before I tried everything to talk myself OUT of doing the walk. But Lydia 2.0 was like HELL NO! You're doing this! And well of course she won the battle.

They called my group and I begin to walk.

I had 2 goals one was to finish it and the second was to finish it under 3 hours.

I'm walking and I set a good pace in the beginning and just walked. I started up the Cooper River Bridge.

Okay tried to insert picture but I need to brush up on the photo placing in a blog.

I'm heading up the massive bridge and I start to slow down and feel the burn set in. I was at mile 3 by then and I knew if I stopped I wouldn't get started again so I get walking and walking and walking. I made it up and begin my descent towards downtown and I was like I'm really doing this I'm at the 4 mile marker and 2 more to go! HOLY SHIT!

So I continue to just walk. Then 5 miles goes by and I'm like hot damn...I'm actually going to finish this and not die. At this point my feet are feeling like lead and I'm alittle thirsty...they ran out of water once I got over the bridge...who runs out of water!?! Anyways

I'm trucking along and I see mile SIX. I was like .2 more miles. I can do this so I round the corner and there are my parents. I start crying and wanting to run, but my lead feet just were like no we're walking. I'm said okay I'm fine with that! I then look up and see the finish line and my dad cheering me on, pointing me out to my mom. I was soooo freakin stoked at the point I didn't care about anything but finishing and seeing my parents.

2 hours and 15 minutes later I walked proud of what I've done and who I morphed in to. I did a 10K...I finished well beneath the time I gave myself. I can lose the weight. This was sort of a symbolic kick off of Lydia 2.0.

That is my 10K experience. I'm planning on doing a 5K June 9th. And there is one in November want to do with Allison, that's around here.

But the one I'm super pumped for is the Disney Princess half marathan, with Stephanie @stephmiller!! We're part of #TeamBadAss! What son!

So I'm a 5K/10K junkie. Can't get enough! Which I don't think is a bad thing! :)

Weigh in 4/17/12

Whoa! Blogger has a whole new set up! And it's  really throwing me off! lol

Anyways I backed up and doing a quick post from this weight in.

I weighted in at 364.9. I gained 1.4 pounds. I'm not quite sure what happen to have a gain. I probably wasn't a good tracker or PMS or had an ass load of excuses piling up! But whatever that week is behind me. I licked my wounds and moved on with the week.

The week had its challenges with 2 proms but I'm hoping I'll be able to cope with what is thrown at me!

That's all for this week. I'm on to become a blogging machine!! :)

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Gym Nazi!

AHHHHH!!! I swear my gym has crazy 5AM goers. Well I guess you have to be...example me. I have another gym tail. I don't know what it is about, either me or my gym but I swear it's a building full of
CA-RAZY!!

Let me take you back to Friday at 6:15 AM, I'm done doing my work out. I did some leg work and actually ran a small bit on the treadmill. I think I'm going to try a program called Couch to 5K this week, just to see what happens and what I can do with it.

So I finish up all my sweating and I go to leave. I don't know if I fall back asleep and begin to sleep walk or if my gym like to play tricks on blondes or if my gym likes to keep people hostages or whatever. But I go to leave and well I can't get out. Again STOP LAUGHING! This is a serious issue. I'm pushing the button and I'm waiting to hear a buzzer thing to open the down. No sound and I try to open the door and it's not opening. I try it again, and same thing. I'm like COME ON! I'm ready to Chuck Norris the glass and go to another gym at this point. While I'm doing all this, there is a old lady there...she'll be called Gym Nazi. I guess she's watching and then out of the blue she yells at me. YOU HAVE THE PRESS THE BUTTON AND PUSH THE DOOR OPEN. Ummmm thanks? Yes she straight up Y-E-L-L-E-D at me. I'm finally free and heading home to continue my day.

And I had a HUGE gym victory. As y'all know I get up and go to the gym at 5AM. Well on Saturday my gym alarm went off and I didn't want to go. But I drugged my sleepy ass out of bed and headed to the gym. I went and worked out for about 45 minutes. After that I felt sooo great and was so glad I went! Gym 2 - Bed 0. And I must say I would NOT have done that a month ago or a week ago! So I'm finally seeing the changes and feeling like this is starting to become a life style! Whoop whoop.

Well until my next blog. I have to blog about my 10K experience! I'm so far behind! I will catch y'all up! Bear with me! Thanks! Love y'all!

The Prodigal Daughter Has Come Back!

Yes I've come back to my people. What I love. I'm just want to apologize for leaving y'all for so long. I'm blaming it on part being lazy and part work...florist problems. Anyways but after a wonderful and very surprising phone call, from my super awesome and one of the best Scramble players I know, Joselin. She's an author check her out also, Stoned Family Robinson...her latest book and she writes for a blog. I heart her! She just called out of the blue and said I had a dream about you and you need to check this book and you need to write! I doesn't matter what you write about...if you don't want to write about your weight loss or you're tired of it or whatever it is. You need to write! So I want to thank you Joselin, I love you and here I am writing. She isn't the only one that has said that my mom...of course she's going to say THAT...she's kind of bias to yours truly! Also a friend on twitter, Brandy @McHealthyMcMama, asked me last week when I was going to write my next blog...here is is/they are! Apparently I have a following, people think like me and enjoy my blogs...strangers and friends and family alike. I honestly just thought family read my blogs...but it looks like other people are reading them as well. So looks like I have to keep up with my blogging. I think y'all just opened Pandora's box! MUUUUHAHAHAHAHA! *insert evil laugh* 

Sunday, March 25, 2012

I&apos;m Drinking on the 5 AM Gym Kool-Aid

Wow! Who knew getting up at 5 AM to hit the gym would feel soooo DAMN good!!! Why did I not come up with this brilliant idea sooner! "oooh I'm not a morning person" well I just might be...if I feel this DAMN good! Boo yah!!

Another positive on the gym front is I cut 3 minutes off my mile, I can do a mile in 20.30 minutes. Almost under 20 mins! That'll happen this week!

So once i got done with my treadmill walk, with my awesome app Zombies, RUN! Yeah i don't run YET! But I can totally walk and the app is still soooo much fun! Its pretty much a game and a running app. And I figure anything that'll get my ass moving is a good thing! :)

So while i got done being chased by zombies, I decided to do some work on the elliptical. Well I did my time and well I got off, went to grab the cleaning spray to wipe down my machine. As I begin to walk towards my said elliptical...which is on a platform...my legs decided "Hey we aren't moving anymore." But my top half was said "Naaah we are continuing forward." So I needles to say I ate a piece of elliptical. Thankfully its low in points. But I totally went face and upper body first towards the hump on the elliptical machine. OH MY G!!!! I burned some serious calories laughing my ass off!! Once I gathered myself if there was such a thing...i proceeded to clean quickly and leave quicker! But on the way out...I had forgotten how to get out of my 24 hour gym. Shut up...stop laughing...it was way to early and I was nursing a bruised ego!

I attempted to leave and searched and searched and SEARCHED for a way out. And well I said screw it...I'll chill out until someone leaves and read these bulletins. Thankfully someone came shortly after me, and pushed the button! I then pushed the button and ran out I'M FREE!! I'M FREE!!!

Went into my car quickly and headed on my way.

That is my story. Only me! :)

Love- LJ



Shaving 3 mins off mile

Thursday, March 22, 2012

A Week of Epiphanies

Well I must apologize for absence. I promise I won't leave y'all like that again!! :)

Anyways just an update on the weight loss front. Well I had a gain this week...so I guess you could say weight gain front. Touché!
As mentioned last week of my gain of 1.5 pounds...the Hubster pointed out to me that it's not JUST 1.5 pounds. If you keep doing that every week for a year you'll gain about 80 pounds. *facepalm* HOLY SHIT!!! Why didn't I ever think of it like that way!??!

So that idea has been tossing and bouncing around in my head this week, while I was tracking, I wasn't tracking eating the best foods and going over! Which I knew wasn't going to be good, and I guess it was an experiment on what I needs change. I would say I'm about 50/50 on eating. So that's 50% healthy and 50 unhealthy. Which to be honest is better than I thought! I'll take that as a non scale victory!

Also I came to the realization that in order for me to go make it to the gym...it fits better into my schedule in the early AM, like 5:30!! YIKES!!! And I'm not a morning person! Sooo for me to get up at 5:00 and be at the gym at 5:30. I was going to put this idea in motion last Thursday but I totally failed on that front. My alarm was set for 5:00 PM! I woke up at 5:30 AM and by then it was to late! So I started today! And boy let me tell you it felt GREAT!! I was like man I should have done this a long time ago!! LOL! But I'll update y'all on the next blog about my gym experience in the dark!

And then the most biggest realization, came in the form of me finally excepting the fact that my body isn't going to lose the same as it did when I was 24 doing Weight Watchers first time around. I realized that my body is going to lose like a 30 year old. (I'm almost 30...I'm 28 years old) And this time around my life is COMPLETELY different from the first time and I'm not comparing them! So I'm at the point where I'm trying this for the first time!

That is my week of Epiphanies! :)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Weigh In 3/6/12

WOW! Who knew following the program would work! I am proud to say that I lost 3.2.

My numbers:
2/28/12 - 363.4 (PMS/DMS week)
3/6/12 - 360.2

So I'm happy with what happened during the week. I had a couple non scale victories. I actually went to the gym and i worked the treadmill. I did 1 mile in 23.5 mins. I think that's pretty good, considering i haven't been the the gym in FOREVER and I'm at my highest weight ever. So I'm planning on getting my mile under 20 mins is my next step, and the I'll go from there.
Also I've been drinking water like a fish again. I feel good about that. I'm just very happy where  I'm heading and achieving my goal for our 1 year anniversary...to have my wedding set fit again. so I'm on the way! :)

until next time.

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Real Talk

So I need to come clean. I suck! My weight loss is like down the crapper. And I'm like whatever. That was my attitude during the weekend. Here is the break down of last week.

I deleted my old Weight Watcher online account, because I'm anal and I'm married and I wanted my new last name all up in my new Weight Watcher future. So I was all pumped and excited for that change. Because I was like this is a fresh start. New beginning. I don't feel as if I had the old weight loss/program hanging over my head. It was honestly I felt as some mental block. I kept hitting that wall. But I fixed that...I was like a new start with Weight Watcher as Lydia Johnston. AWESOME...Rock on!

Also I don't know if y'all remember talking about taking Healthy Trim, but I've decided not to take that anymore. It just wasn't the avenue I wanted to take and I got straight of sick feeling when I was taking it. So its just me and my healthy food...and the support of all of y'all. No pills, no surgery, just me. And I'm very happy with that decision.

Then will the old habits started to creep in. Well hubby has been training and working some crazy insane hours and now we eat uber early. Like 4:30 eating earlier because he goes to bed at like 6:30ish. Then I didn't get off until 4:00 or 4:30. No time to cook. So we ate out everyday...let my emphasis that...E-V-E-R-Y-D-A-Y. Then I forgot my lunch...dumbass. So I was forced to eat out. I was held a gunpoint and made to eat Wendy's, Moe's, or whatever fattening food I could find in the deli. Really Lydia? On top of that PMSing. So my gain was a combo of UBER poor food choices and PMS. BUT that is just excuses. What I hear is excuse, excuse, excuse. Well NO MORE! Because I had a BRILLIANT epiphany on Sunday/Monday.

I realized that i need to pack my lunch! HAHAHA! And I need to start drinking water. My soda intake has picked up like WHOA! So I've been doing this challenge on Twitter called the #100ozchallenge. You just "log" your water intake. Super easy! DUH! And then I see all my twitter friends being successful, whether is a NSV or SV, and I'm like super proud and secretly jealous because I want that! So hello my epiphany said, go get it! Then on top of it...I signed up for my first 10k walk/run for the year. I need to start working toward that goal. And than my last super personal goal is to have my wedding ring set fit...again. i think that would be alot to me and Brent. :) Yay me!

So its Wednesday and I've had 2 days of successful water intake, paying meticulous attention to labels again, super health snacks and lunches for the week and dinners. On top of it all Hubby is getting a new route and doesn't have to go in at the ass crack up dawn, and work a bajillion hours. So I can actually cook! SWEET! And I think I top of all that the possibility of being a real life blogger for www.priorfatgirl.com has me super stoked. To understand read "Knock Knock"!

I feel as if everything is lining back up and getting back into a routine. Because I tell I love a routine! lol :)

Until next blog! :)

Knock, Knock!

Who's there?
Opportunity!

OMG! I have got some news for y'all! HEY NOW!!! I just self notimated myself to be a blogger on a REAL website!! YAY!!! OMG!!!!!
Here are the details:
http://networkedblogs.com/uzz8U
It's for a spot on www.priorfatgirl.com and they want to expand their family to have someone who is starting on their jounrey or close to it. UMMMM HELLO! Who is a better choice none other than...ME!! :) So if/when I get make it to the second round...there will be a voted of priorfatgirl readers. And of course I have y'alls, my faithfully readers, votes...right?!? :) And if I don't...I'll make you! :) J/K...sort of! ;)

I'm sooooo excited...I'm busting from the seams with excitement!! This could be the A.) Kick in the ass I need, B.) A good thing for my blogging/book career, and C.) It'll be an all around awesome experience!!! Yay for being AWESOME!!!! :)

Here is my email entry:


"Hey Jen,
I just want to self nominate myself. Here alittle bit about my story.
My name is Lydia Johnston, and well I'm a fat girl. I've always been a fat girl. I never thought of myself as anything more than the funny fat girl. I use my fat a shield to protect myself from mean people...but in the process slowly killing myself. Not the best idea in the grand scheme of things!
Like most people my journey has been a yo-yo. Lose some, gain some more, lose some more, and gain a whole lot more. And its the vicious cycle we all go through; however my journey changed about 5 years ago when I joined Weight Watchers with my mom. We joined because she was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes, and thought to myself, I'll be damned if I'm getting diabetes my ass is doing something about this right now. And we did. I lost 103 pounds over the course of a year and half. My mom lost 50 pounds. Super proud of her...yay mom! Around the 85 pounds mark, the boys started to notice my weight loss and I was uber confident...still am...but back then I thought I was one bad ass mofo. So I begin dating this guy, who I thought was going to marry and was so madly in love with. *rolls eyes* That was suppose to be sarcastic but I know when typing it doesn't come across. :) So long story short my "prince" turned into a totally douchebag, He actually shook me to my core with his mental and emotional abuse. Which then began my decent into the depression tornado.
After I picked up myself and dusted off my ego, I ended up moving out on my own...in a new city...by myself...first time EVER in my 24 years of life. The first time where I actually had bills in my name, actually had roommates, and actually started to experience REAL growing pains. At that point in my journey I was still down 85-95 pounds, but October 2008 I reached one of my personal goal during my journey by losing 100 pounds. I was on cloud nine, I actually did it. ME all by myself, no one else but me!
Then shit started to hit the fan in my life. I had crappy roommates times 2, my job was crappy. I started to sink further into my depression. I actually thought about killing myself...it got that bad for me. It was one bad thing on top of another on top of another...etc. And I couldn't handle after about a year and half. Finally my BFF and then BF (now husband) got me the help I needed. I found out I had a case of situation depression. I took the necessary help and I bounced back from it to start kicking ass again.
Needless to say during that time my weight crept back on. But I was okay with it in the beginning because I needed to fix my mental state first. But 2 years later I'm back at my highest ever.
But I will say during that time, I got married (June, 11, 2011). So the stress of planning a wedding on top of coming out my depression; my weight has decided to come back and stay awhile.
So that's my story.
Where I'm at now. I'm a wife. I have a wonderful and loving husband. We went to start a family but my weight has got to go first. My goal is 218 pounds. We already have 2 wonderful furbabies. Actually when I reach goal I want to work for a gym and/or Weight Watchers. I am doing Weight Watchers. I know the program works I've had major success on it before. I have full time job. I have 218 pounds I want to lose for my health. I'm 28.
I think I can relate to most woman, I'm brutally honest with myself...to much sometimes. And I know you'll probably get a lot of responses but whether or not I get picked I'm still going to be losing weight and blogging because its what I love to do and its what I'm meant to do with my life.
I've attached my picture...if you need me to I'll crop out my handsome hubby! :)






Thanks for reading.
Sincerely
Lydia Johnston
Soon to be Part of the PriorFatGirl Family! ;) (No pressure)"

Friday, February 17, 2012

Action Figure Lydia

Let me set the scene for this blog.

Wednesday night around, 7:30 pm. Must drove to work for a second to place an order. But realize I need gas. So I pull into local gas at the corner of my street.
Imagine this...I honestly probably dress gross so this crap doesn't happen.
I was wearing my basketball shorts, that go past my knee. and a black shirt, my dirty hair in a ball on top of my head. Not what you would want to be picking up or let alone talking to...

Now on with the blog...

I pull in to my usual gas station, but the Hubster is at home because he is going to bed. He has to get up super early now. So I'm flying solo and roll into the gas station find my pump in the front, near the door. Just in case someone sketchy comes along. I get out of my car, pay at the pump, and begin to put gas into my car.

Then all of a sudden a stupid moron in a white chevy truck, decides he wants to talk to me...

My face -


And if you know this is pretty much the reaction he got.

Now here is are conversation. Yes he wanted to talk to me, I'll type what he wanted to talk about (out of wanting to kill me...probably), the few words i said but I'm going to also give you my thought inside my head...that's were it gets funny.

Moron: I don't want to waste your time but...
My Thought: Then don't...
My Actual Words: Ummmm okay.

Moron: I don't know if you're from here...
My Thought: I'm not now...
My Actual Words: Nope just passing through.

Moron: I don't know if you know where John's Island is...
My Thoughts: I do but you're not founding that shit out...Just to let you know I'm married, husband will track your ass down, my mom is nucking futs, my father-in-law is an ex-navy man along with my dad. I know Italians that may or may not have mob relations.
My Actual Words: *shrugs* no

Moron: I just need gas to get to John's island and its a long story...
My Thoughts: OH shit...seriously...I don't give a flying fuck about your life. Who the hell comes to a gas station and does this shit?! Apparently you.
My Actual Words: ummmm Okay

Moron: I need 5 bucks to gas.
My Thoughts: IF I had 5 bucks: A.) You wouldn't get it. B.) I'm not going anywhere near your creepy truck or your dumbass to give you 5 bucks. C.) okay you can go now.
My Actual Words: Nope, I got paid and already broke.

Moron: *stumbles over words* Well alright (and he drives off)
My Actual Words: About fucking time. *looking around to make sure I'm not going to be redneck ambushed*

So I stop pumping gas, quickly get in my car and call Brent. And tell him I'm never pumping gas alone. LOL!

But then of course my mind begins to play around with what would have happened if he tried something. Then that's when if dawned on me...I need to get fit and become an action figure. Kick Ass Lydia would be the name. I think its fitting in several ways.

But the moron drove to another gas station to get gas and I hit the highway like I was going out of town! LOL! :) I'm fine, I just wanted to let you know I'm going to become an action figure and wanted to share a random event.

I'm outtie!
Bayverse OP facepalm Pictures, Images and Photos

Weigh In 2/14/2012

The Weight Watchers gods were far to kind to me this past week. As mentioned before the insanity of Valentine's week took its toll on me, and eating "right" or choosing healthier options was non existent.

Do I regret my choices? Hell no!
I knew that week was going to be ape-shit-crazy, but I also knew this week I'm on vacay and getting back to the basic and back on track!

So let me not keep you in suspense anymore.

Weigh in 1/29/12 - 360.3
Weigh in 2/7/12 - 357
Weigh in 2/14/12 - 358.6

Yes a gain but considering the stress and what I ate, I'll take it. Its a gain, of course I wanted a loss, but I will walk away quickly just in case the Weight Watcher gods change their mind.

Agenda this week, get back to cooking, NOW I'm going to become besties with a guy name Gym. I'm cleaning out my garage with family, that's exercising right? lol :) Speaking of cooking probably should go grocery shopping since Hubster was home alone for supper a couple nights! lol Need to restock! :)

This week I'm back on track committing myself to WW 110%.

Lydia, Do you take Weight Watchers to be your lawful wedded healthy lifestyle.
I do!
Lydia, Do you take H2O to be the your drink of choice?
I do!
Lydia, Do you promise not to leave Gym behind?
I do, I do, I do!
Lydia, Do you promise to be keep being awesome?
Duh!

Signing out! LJ

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Weigh In 2/7/2012

First of all I want to thank all of y'all for the love and support, in reference to my last blog! That means alot to me!! I just sometimes get wrapped in my own head and forget I have people that love me and are going to support me! And bonus I have a whole twitter account with people going through the same thing!!!! OMG! :) Thanks!!

On to the topic the blog!

Last week numbers:
Weigh in 1/29/12 - 360.3
Weigh in 2/7/12 - 357

Now if I did my math correct...that's a 3.3 LOSS!!! Booo yaaaahhh!! I lost and I know this sound corny but I feel super awesome! Like I can conquer anything! Sweeeet, I haven't felt like that in a loooooong time...pertaining the my weight that is!

So that week is behind me, now its time to make it a trend! Word.
But I'm alittle nervous about this week coming up because its Valentine's and I'm not going to want to cook. So frozen meals, cereal, and take out are on the meal plan. I just need to make smarter choice...duh! but when one is working 10-12 hr days...food and what I choose to eat, is the last thing on my mind. I just want something in my belly and i want it like yesterday! lol but i have to figure out a way to balance things out because this clearly will be a yearly thing. so if i want to succeed, i need to find a balance.

My goal for this week, not to gain and to find a balance.

There is however light at the end of this tunnel. I'll be on vacay, or staycation, so I'll be kicking it into high gear!
Eating right - check
Gym - double check check
Cooking - check
Being awesome - duh! check!

So needless to say I'm going to be MIA from facebook, blogging, twitter, and more than likely everything until 2/15. Yes I'll be alive but functional seriously doubt! :)

Have a great week and happy counting! LJ

Thursday, February 2, 2012

I've Awaken a Sleeping Elephant

Its time to be honest with myself.

As y'all know I'm battling the bulge. I've set goals and I've set my mind on the final results and what I'm going to do and blah blah blah...
But that's the problem. I'm not getting there. I've maintained...I've gained...I've done everything but lose. The Hubster made a comment the other day, after several minutes of me bitching, crying, and whining about my weight loss, he said maybe Weight Watcher isn't the program right now. I was like What?! I've been doing Weight Watchers on and off for 5 years this May. I know the program works, i had mucho success on the program. Its not the program...its...ME....

I'm in a different place from where I was when I first started.
May 2007 - Living with Mom and Dad. Working just to pay a car payment. Sort of helped with cooking. Dad was OCD about cleaning. The only thing I literally did was lose weight. I had no boyfriend, I had my BFF, who's house was close enough I walked to it. I can NOT stress that I just worked and lost weight!
Fast forward to February 2012 - Alot has transpired since May 2007. I was in a "relationshit" early 2008, that ended horribly wrong, I moved from my hometown to be out on my own in a new city, where I knew one person. So I was responsible for a roof over my head, food, everything. I actually got a huge wake up call. I had major drama roommates, work, the crappy jobs, depression reared its ugly head. Through all the insanity, I got into a very good relationship, which led to marriage, so the stress of planning a wedding. My job, as mentioned before I'm a florist. I'm retail worker. Which means my hours are shit! lol

But I survived it. I'm hear in front up you my highest weight that I've known.
So I've debated whether or not to post my numbers...because that's a really personal thing but in order for me to be honest with myself, I feel that it will help me. A release, like I'm letting go of my past my security...my wall.

I use my weight as a shield. A barrier...of...fat... Its clearly a mental thing. I figure in some sort of twisted reality that if you don't like me...its because I'm fat. Because honestly I don't know why people wouldn't like me! Its baffles me to this day! :) But in my weird reality, that's what happens when things hit the fan! I retreated into my old habits of using food as a comfort...a crutch. Because when shit its the fan...food is there for me. When I'm stressed, "hey food what's up". When I'm sad, "food no one like me." When I'm happy, "hey food did you see that!!!!" When I'm bored, "OMG food, I can't believe that happened on *insert TV show*".

So food is a crutch. And I LOOOOOVE food. I honestly feel its an addiction. And unfortunately I need my addiction to stay alive. But I'm here today confessing this. And I have decided to post my numbers because from here on out its all about being honest.

Starting weight as 1/29/12 - 360.3

oooh I'm nervous posting that makes it real.
But I won't be that weight again. And if you feel like being a hater and judging me. Then stop reading, delete me from whatever list I'm on of yours. Because I'm to old for that bullshit. I'm at a point in my life where I like surrounding myself with positive people! Word!

From this point on I'll be posting my numbers, so to keep it real and so it can be changed!

And I've decided to get alittle help...a jump start...I'm going to be trying Healthy Trim, along with Weight Watchers. Its an appetite suppressant. But once the spring time flower business slows down...then I'll be back to just Weight Watchers and me!

Well there is this blog! Enjoy. A small peek into my mind as always!

Much love! LJ

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I Can See My Future

And my name is in lights!

I'm getting a taste of what my life is shaping up to be. I'm off today and I'm actually blogging and getting motivated to carry out the rest of the week! I could get use to this life.:)
Boy do I have ALOT to spill about.

The reason I mention blogging and being home, is because I have a dream/desire to be a writer. I'll have a book on the New York Times, I'll travel the country and sign books and be inspiring. :) I bet you are wondering what I shall write about...
My weight loss journey.
Its been and will continue to be an experience. I've lost 103 pounds with Weight Watchers back in 2007, before life decided to get alittle ape shit ca-razy!! But things have soooo settled and have passed. Now I'm just working and battling the bulge. So I can really focus on my craft, my dream, my purpose in life.

Hence the title of my blog and twitter, "The 218 lb Elephant". I've always felt that I've been "A pretty fat". Oh you know when people say "You have such a pretty face...if you just loss some weight", really? So I've always known I've been fat but it was, "like the elephant in the room", it wasn't talked about. And 218 pounds is the weight I have/want to lose to be considered at goal weight.

So there is description of my name if any of y'all were wondering.
Again I'm getting off course...the joys of an ADD writer! :oP

As I mentioned before my dream is actually coming true soon. Because my loving and wonderful dear Husband got a new job, making more money, less stress, and all around a better well being for him! YAY!!! Hubster I love you muches and so proud of you!
He mentioned because he knows this is a huge dream of mine, that at one point once things are paid off and we have money in savings. He suggested I just take time off to focus on losing weight and writing and he'll take care of the rest. Now ladies, ain't that a keeper!? :)

So that means gym time, more cooking time, more time to kick ass!!! I'm so excited. Then I'll be less stressed because we won't be depending on my money, we can just save it!
That is a current plan but of course things can change.

I'm moving to another blog to discuss my weight loss! :)